Sunday, January 24, 2010

No sense nonsense

My hateful vacuum cleaner decided to stop working for me this morning. The ‘bag full’ light is staying on which indicates to me that there is some kind of blockage somewhere. The bag is most definitely NOT full, the filter is clean and there’s no visible clump of debris anywhere screwing up the works.

It wasn’t sucking though. And my carpet was decidedly unclean. And I have friends coming for lunch. Sigh.

I took a deep breath to stave off the desire to throw the horrible thing across the room and instead I performed some rudimentary diagnostics. I ascertained that it is the hose causing the problem; there’s suction into the machine with the hose off and therefore logic tells me the problem is the hose. I ran another hose (the garden one actually) through the vacuum hose to dislodge whatever offending material was stuck in there but…nothing; there is no blockage.


By now I was feeling increasingly frustrated and though I should have been preparing lunch, I loaded the contraption into the wagon and headed to the local vacuum cleaner ‘experts’ who have confirmed my diagnosis. The problem is the hose. We hooked up my vacuum with their hose and it sucks like (insert whichever grubby euphemism works for you) so they checked my hose for a blockage using their industrial sized sucker/blower machine but…Hoover-Hygienenothing.


They’ve ordered me a new hose and were kind enough to give me a loaner until the new hose arrives at the end of the week, but I’m still completely mystified – a hose is surely a piece of corrugated plastic wrapped around air; what the f**k can actually go wrong with that? Is there something technical about hoses that I don’t know?


I have now vacuumed the house with the little loaner machine and it did a pretty good job I must say. I have made the salads for lunch and put a pitcher of margarita in the refrigerator to chill. I’m about to start skewering the marinated chicken and vegetable kebabs for the barbecue and am hoping that the rest of the day will go to plan. I still need to squeeze in a shower before my guests arrive in an hour so I better get moving.

What have you got planned for Sunday in your house?


  1. Sorry about the vacuum cleaner, but lunch sounds wonderful. I'm really feeling the margaritas were a good choice after your ordeal.

  2. what a pain

    hope you were all ready when your guests arrived
    and had fun

    this morning I wet to church
    this after Im going for a drive out in the country to pick up some books I won on trademe:)

  3. Had a great day in the end. Just got back from the movies where I saw The Lovely Bones finally. It was OK, a bit trippy though not unexpected as I read the book a couple of years ago. Heading towards midnight and got an early start tomorrow for work so hitting the hay now. Goodnight all.

  4. First, let's agree on this; Vacuums sucks!
    Or at least, they should. We have this neat solution to the world of vacuums. We buy reasonably cheap ones, and when they start to malfunction... bye bye!
    In fact, we even name them. Currently now 'Sniffy 3' is hired for the job.

    Glad your day was great, despite it all.


  5. Glad to hear it all ended well, Lou. I cope well with most of life's situations, but definitely not with broken mechanical things. They simply make me nuts.

    We're in for a grey and rainy Sunday here - but on the plus side, we had a small miracle occur in which the dogs let us sleep in until 10:30 am.

    To celebrate the miracle of the puppies, I am consulting Nigella to begin with a fashionable brunch, most likely followed by smart cocktails, nibbles and some great Britcoms on DVD - or perhaps the new DVD set of Maggie Smith at the BBC that I just received.

  6. We had the Round The Way Gays for brunch, and a little early celebration, ooooh, and gifts, for my upcoming birthday.
    Tequila Bloody Marys.
    Aaaaaaaah Sunday!

  7. That's not a bad idea Daniel, I might have to consider that next time I'm in the market for a new vacuum cleaner.

    Lucky you DuPree - I love Nigella. Enjoy your vid.

    Oooh a birthday coming up Bob? Have a great day, I hope you're spoiled rotten with gifts and company.

  8. The blond was asked if you can hear yourself scream in a vacuum to which she answered ... It it turned on?
    Sorry. Couldn't resist.

  9. Lol Lori. I'm hopeless at remembering jokes (maybe the bottle blond effect?) but I like that one so I'll have to try.

  10. Sounds like it turned out to be a nice day for you after all. I studied all day....and all night. There better be one hell of a good job waiting for me.

  11. Grrrr! I've had many rows with my vacuum cleaner as well, Lou. Mine is bagless and all the parts are supposed to be washable, so nothing to buy again. My hose gets clogged often...right at the handle-part where it turns.
    Yours is quote the mystery...and now we may never know, right??
    Hope those margaritas hit the spot! You deserve it!

  12. It sounds like there's a hole in your hose, other than the two that are supposed to be on each end :-)

  13. Hi Lou, I have a little something for you on my blog.....IF you so desire:

  14. I hate vacuums, on a happier note my adopted daughter just asked if she could vacuum the dog and then I read this post? LOL

  15. I should have been studying biker baby - I wouldn't be in the mess I'm in right now if I had have hit the books for a day or two over my 4 weeks holiday at Christmas - very slack of me!

  16. Cheers Kathryn - bagless does seem to be the way to go these days. Perhaps my net one...

    I think you're right Intelliwench - I be picking up my new hose tomorrow and I'll try getting to the bottom of it when I talk to them - what else could it be?

    Thanks Bob - I'll do the bizz over the coming weekend. I appreciate it.

    TC it's not actually a bad idea. We're nearly through summer here but Bonnie, my old girl, is still losing the last of her winter coat despite daily brushing. I might think about trying the vacuum on her earlier in summer if she wasn't so freaked out by the thing - she really hates it.

  17. Lou, I definitely think margaritas were in order after the cleaner mishap. Glad they could provide a loaner. Nothing extra special going on here, just life, and that is ok by me.


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